Note

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The Question

Some people like to travel with a companion. Other people prefer to travel alone. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your choice.

Sample Essay 1

Do you support travelling with a companion or not? In my opinion, I believe that it is more interesting to travel with a companion, because it is cheaper. In addition, it helps make new friends.
Sharing different things in our life such as travelling has many advantages. Firstly, travel with a companion will be cheap. For example, last summer I suggested Yazan , my friend, to travel to Africa, he shared me everythings such as costs of travelling tickets, cost of all meals and cost of enrolling cards for all zoos in Africa, he helped me to see the National zoo that had a nice offer that is no money could paid for two persons, we saw elephants, they were different than what we say on TV, after we returned back home, we decided to go every year to different countries around the world, it is definitely affordable trip.
Moreover, travelling with a companion helps you to make a lot of friends. For instance, last week I won a quiz on the internet, the prize was 500 $ or trip with a person I did not know from foreign country, I told them why?, they illustrated that they want to extend the idea of cultural exchanges. I chose the second choice, the person’s name is Joan from Canada, we travelled to Egypt in order to see pyramids, we felt happy and now we are very closest friends, he invited me for a trip to Canada next month.
As I have illustrated, travelling with a person is affordable and helps making a lot of friends. People! You have to think wisely, or as we all know killing two birds with one stone, by applying this proverb we make new friends and save a lot of money after we travel.

Tutor Comments

I've just reviewed three of your independent essays, and since the same suggestions in regards to structure and organization apply to all of your work, I will keep my comments here brief.

1. If you haven't already looked at it, please consult our guide to the independent essay. It has a lot of tips and strategies and unlike a lot of textbooks it is written for beginners like yourself.

2. As in your other essays, you have often used commas when you should have used periods. Read those body paragraphs again. Proofread it and post it again and I'll let you know if you are on the right track.

3. Remember line breaks between paragraphs.

4. Again, I don't really have the time to pick out and correct all your grammatical errors, but do take a look at the first two essays where I did do that for you. Be aware that there are significant errors in every sentence, and this will prevent you from getting more than a 1 or 2 (10 to 15 points) on the TOEFL. If you want to get a higher score you will need to spend significant time developing your grammar skills. I hate to be rough on your work, but I just have to be honest with you. Just keep practicing and you will get to where you want to be. In the meantime, you can compensate for your weak grammar by saving five minutes at the end of the independent writing task to proofread and correct your work.

5. If you come back in a few days or weeks with new stuff after having looked at my suggestions I will be happy to take another very close look at your grammar and correct some mistakes.